It’s not easy is it, asking for help? I’m a natural team player but when I’m feeling the pressure I know that I can batten down the hatches and refuse to ask for help. How about you? Do you like asking for help or is it something that you avoid at all costs?
There are so many reasons why we don’t like asking for help. Often it’s to do with pride, seeming like we’re unable to cope or fear of failure. We often view it as weakness and yet actually the reverse is true. It takes a brave person to ask for help.
Turning this idea on its head for a minute, if I were to ask, ‘Would you want to help someone in your team who’s struggling?’ I bet your immediate response would be, ‘Yes of course’. There wouldn’t be any thoughts about the person being weak or not able to cope, it’s far more likely to be of concern and wanting to help another human being.
Despite what the press may have us believe the world is full of good people and the majority of us will always step in to help others not least because it makes us feel better about ourselves. Research shows that helping others can increase our health and happiness.
So I wonder what would happen if we chose to take this opposing point of view the next time we were worrying about asking for someone’s help. How would it feel if you knew that by asking for help you were actually helping that person/that team to feel better about themselves? Suddenly it doesn’t feel like such a hard thing to do does it?
I realise it is hard to ask for help, especially at this time of the year when everyone around us is busy as well. If that’s the case then maybe a team coaching session is in order? By this, I do not mean let’s get together and moan about all that we have to do (a sure fire way to feel worse) but a session that is supportive and challenging; what really needs to be achieved and what can be left for another day?
Combining some of my earlier tips, playing music, moving away from your desk I’m sure within half an hour of some so-coaching your perspective will have changed and you will feel energised to do what you need to do!